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Just when you thought baseball collectibles couldn't get any more absurdly expensive, Shohei Ohtani's pants step up to the plate—literally.

In a move that could make your wallet cry harder than a Mets fan in September, a baseball card featuring a scrap of Ohtani's trousers sold for a jaw-dropping $1.07 million at Heritage Auctions. Why the fuss over fabric? Well, this wasn't just any laundry day leftover; it's from the Dodgers superstar's history-making game where he became MLB's first-ever 50 home run, 50 stolen base player. Talk about pants power.

This one-of-a-kind Topps Dynasty Black card flaunts Ohtani's signature elegantly scribbled in gold ink, alongside a glistening MLB logo patch, ripped straight from the pants he wore during his iconic game against the Miami Marlins. The buyer's identity? Still a bigger mystery than where all those missing socks go.

Shattering the previous Ohtani-card auction record—set at a modest half-million dollars for a 2018 rookie card—this sale proves that pants really do make the man (and apparently, the card).

Not content with just one outrageous collectible, Topps created three unique cards celebrating Ohtani's legendary 50-50 game. Another, featuring batting glove tags and another piece of those pricey pants, fetched a "mere" $173,240 back in February. Guess some fans prefer gloves over slacks.

Chris Ivy, Heritage Auctions' sports auction guru, emphasized the historical importance, stating, “Shohei Ohtani is currently baseball’s biggest rockstar, and this card captures a genuinely historic moment—plus, people really dig that logo patch.” And here's a twist: this record-breaking card isn't even from Ohtani's rookie year, defying the sacred rookie-card-rule collectors swear by.

Earlier this month, Pirates pitcher Paul Skenes had his own rookie card fetch $1.11 million, but let's be real—pants weren't involved, so does it even count?

For those wondering how Ohtani actually pulled off the milestone, he entered LoanDepot Park sitting pretty at 48 home runs and 49 steals. By inning two, he'd already stolen bases 50 and 51 like he was grabbing free samples at Costco. Fast forward to the seventh inning, and after politely fouling off two pitches, he launched Marlins reliever Mike Baumann’s lazy curveball 391 feet, straight into baseball immortality. That particular ball later sold for an eye-watering $4.39 million—because, clearly, there's no limit to what collectors will spend to own a piece of Shohei history.

At this rate, expect socks, shoelaces, and chewing gum wrappers to hit auction blocks soon. Collectors, prepare your bank accounts—and your laundry baskets.